To The Woman That Can’t Say Anything Nice About Her Husband

To The Woman That Can’t Say Anything Nice About Her Husband

Nearly everyday, I see you degrading your husband or badmouthing him with your friends online.

I see you complaining about your man and “ranting” about all of the things you can’t stand about your spouse.

I see you share articles that gripe about men and their roles as fathers and husbands.

“my husband never cleans”

“I feel like a single parent”

“he’s always at work”

“he doesn’t appreciate anything I do…”

it goes on and on…

from little comedic jabs to full on rants.

For some reason, it seems you find the internet a ‘safe place’ to let out your frustrations and hurt when it comes to your marriage.

The thing is, it’s not safe to complain about your spouse.

It is actually very dangerous for your marriage.

You may say, ‘well, us woman need to talk, and get our feelings out…’ or ‘its natural to complain about marriage’

No, it’s not.

What is natural is to take your complaints to your man himself.

If you have hurt feelings or things you find frustrating in your marriage, you should spend time discussing those things with the only person who will be able to do anything about it.

Your husband.

There is no excuse that justifies your complaining.

Yes, I am being frank, but that is the whole point of this post.

YOU ARE HURTING YOUR MARRIAGE INSTEAD OF FIXING IT.

It really is that obvious when reading your posts or hearing your whining.

I see you spending time and energy writing and commenting about him on social media.

I  hear you carry on endlessly about how your husband doesn’t do enough.

don’t feel sorry for you.

You know why?

Because by complaining and going on and on about how your marriage sucks, is only making it worse.

You are only attracting the very things you don’t want!

What you think about, you bring about.

amazing-thinking-of-you-quotes-think-good-and-good-follows-think-evil-and-follows-you-are-what-you-think-all-day-long-joseph-murphy

If you spend time and energy thinking about the worst qualities in your husband, it’s safe to bet, those qualities will flourish.

It’s also safe to bet that deep down, you want to have a healthy marriage.

And your husband probably wants to have a healthy marriage too.

And God wants you to have a healthy marriage.

The secret God wants you to know, that is actually no secret at all…is that we all are blessed with free will.

Free will to think about anything we want.

God has blessed us with amazing minds!

POWERFUL MINDS!

We have amazing and powerful minds to decide all day, every day, what we will think about.

We can think about things we love about our husbands or we can think of things that make us feel bitter.

 

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I think we can all agree that there are certain Laws that are always true.

One Law that is true about our powerful thoughts is that, this world  doesn’t recognize what you want versus what you don’t want.

It only brings you more of what you think about.

This is the Law of Physics in action 24/7.

Don’t ever spend energy thinking {or talking about!} things you don’t want.

Spend it else where, like maybe….with your husband…working out those very problems you tell all of your friends about…

ain’t nothin’ gonna change for you or your marriage unless you get off of your soap box and start changing it yourself.

Happily Ever After doesn’t exist unless you are giving 100% effort.

Complaining is giving 0%.

I know some of you are going to say, ‘but I feel so much better after I vent to my best friend.’

In my experience, don’t do it.

Just because something feels good, does’t mean it is coming from a good place.

Didn’t your mom ever tell you, if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all…?

Why would it be different when it comes to your husband?

If you are the type of person that likes to get things off of your chest, there are better ways.

Your energy and thoughts can be productive and will make a difference in your relationship.

Instead of venting online or to a friend you could,

  • Pray, talk to God about your frustrations.
  • Write a letter or email to your spouse explaining how you have been feeling.
  • Start a personal journal or diary.
  • Make a list of all of the things you love about your husband.
  • Think of when you first fell in love with your spouse and remember how you felt about him then.

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  • Do something out of the ordinary to help your husband, even if you don’t feel like it.
  • Go to counseling
  • Ask your husband to schedule a time to talk/go on a date {alone without kids} so you can properly address your feelings with him.
  • Remember your wedding day.

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Do, literally anything besides complain about your husband to other people.

The biggest thing here is to see that there is still good in your husband despite his imperfections.

Love him unconditionally.

Sing songs of praise about your husband.

Show off all of his wonderful qualities.

Point out the little things you like about him to other people.

Be his #1 fan through good times and bad.

Challenge yourself to only say nice things about your husband and watch your union grow ever deeper.

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